Dad pulled me out of bed by my hair to help on the farm - rural abuse victims need more support

Warning: This story contains content that some readers might find distressing

Growing up on a farm, Tracy Lewis loved being around their animals but said the physical and emotional abuse from her farmer father was "torture".

When she was eight, she recalled her dad pulling her out of bed by her hair to go lambing as her battered mum told her "you have to get the lamb out or we're both going to die".

Tracy, now 48 and a farmer herself, and other domestic abuse survivors are calling on governments to better support victims in rural areas.

The UK government said it was working to address disparities while the Welsh government said challenges will be considered in its next national strategy.

For many people the idea of growing up in the mid Wales countryside surrounded by trees and animals sounds idyllic, but Tracy says her dad was physically and emotionally abusive.

Tracy's family have given their permission to the BBC for her to share her story.

"I remember my father pulled me out of bed by my hair to go and lamb a ewe," she recalled.

"I walked past the bathroom and my mum's face had blood all over it and her nose was squashed, she'd been crying. She said to me, you have to get the lamb out or we're both going to die."

Tracy said the animals would sometimes be used as a form of control or a catalyst for abuse.

"I was getting beaten up when something died, my mum was getting hurt when an animal was poorly," she recalled. "It felt like slavery, we loved the animals and farming but we were isolated and stuck."

Tracy, who was raised at the farm in Llanbister in Powys, would sometimes think about calling Childline as she said she felt so petrified.

"The farming world is the best place to be, neighbours will always help you out but abuse can be hidden very easily," said the mum-of-three.

"Everyone knows everybody, but what goes on behind closed doors will stay behind closed doors.

"For me it was terror and horror, my mum got the worst of it and she tried her best to protect us. But she was totally isolated, the farm was her life."

She said farmers often had generational businesses and relied on markets and trade with others, adding that raising abuse could affect livelihoods.

Tracy also claims her father, who is now dead, financially abused her, stating that the farm would be passed down to her.

She said she worked on it for 20 years and paid rent to him under the impression the family farm would one day become hers.

After finding out it was not left to her in his will, she said she has had to "fight" to retain ownership of it.

Tracy is one of about 11 million people living in rural areas - more than 15% of the UK population.

The National Rural Crime Network says the true picture of rural abuse is often hidden, with survivors often having more barriers to reach support.

One smallholding owner said her rurality enabled an ex-partner to hold her at gunpoint for eight hours with no-one to hear her screams.

Rhianon Bragg said she screamed when Gareth Wyn Jones ambushed her with the gun in north Wales in 2019 but knew that no-one would hear her because she lives rurally.

"There were several moments that night when I thought I wouldn't see my children again," she recalled.

Rhianon has spoken in-depth about her experience at her smallholding in Gwynedd as part of a new BBC iPlayer series It Happened To Me.

She has since worked with agencies like the police to try to address issues about domestic abuse and stalking in rural areas.

"Domestic abuse changed our home from a place of peaceful seclusion to a place of vulnerable isolation and what I experienced was the additional barriers that living rurally created," said Rhianon.

She said all UK and Welsh government domestic abuse policies should be "rural proofed" and highlighted issues such as internet connectivity and distance from police stations.

"There is so much that should be addressed for people to be treated evenly, and at the moment, if you live rurally you're on the back foot," said Rhianon.

Tracy urged anyone affected by abuse to speak out about it.

"Tell someone, a friend, a neighbour, once you start telling people, things will move," she said.

"A good overhaul of policy would be for the best because out here you can hide a lot of stuff. I think there's a lot more domestic violence that goes on in rural communities than anyone will ever know," added Tracy.

A report by the UK's first working group focused on rural inequality and domestic abuse said rural domestic abuse victims were being failed.

As part of a 12-point plan, the report published in May by RiTA - Rural Initiatives Tackling Abuse - recommended the UK government establish a parliamentary commission on rural domestic abuse and "rural-proof" government strategies.

The Domestic Abuse Commissioner for England and Wales said she "welcomed" the report and told the BBC the realities of rural life for victims can be "frequently weaponised by their perpetrators".

Dame Nicole Jacobs said: "If we're serious about tackling domestic abuse and addressing inequalities across society, services and support must be designed with rural victims in mind.

"That means making sure rural communities are not overlooked and ensuring specialist services have the funding and resources they need to reach every victim, wherever they live."

The report follows a 2019 National Rural Crime Network's Captive and Controlled report which suggested domestic abuse lasts 25% longer on average in the most rural areas compared with towns and cities.

"In rural Wales, distance is not just geography - it has a real impact on whether someone can access safety and support," said Hayley Heard, of Montgomeryshire Family Crisis Centre.

"Domestic abuse thrives on isolation," added Hayley. "In a rural community, that isolation can be magnified.

"There may be no transport, nowhere private to go and sometimes a fear that everyone will know if you ask for help."

The centre said they supported 296 women, 88 men and 231 children in the last financial year and feel "there is a huge gap between rural and urban domestic abuse".

Hayley said covering a rural part of the country like north Powys - an area of 839sq miles (2,173sq km) and which can take four hours to travel from one end to the other - came with extra costs such as fuel to cover long distances.

The charity recently lost a funding bid for around £102,000 and as chief executive, Hayley said the impact was "quite catastrophic".

"That was to maintain our children's and young persons project who do a lot of work within schools," she said.

"Raising awareness needs to be something we need to promote. The abuse isn't different living rurally but the barriers are different."

Tracy said that school was a "saviour" for her as a child and that the money would have been "invaluable".

"If we can explain to children what abuse is and what it looks like, that would be a really good place to start," she added.

The UK government said they were "working to address disparities in provision" and have pledged more than £1bn in dedicated funding over the next three years to improve support to rural victims.

"Close collaboration with charities and community organisations is helping us better understand the barriers facing rural communities," they said in a statement.

"No victim of domestic abuse should be denied support because of where they live."

More than three-quarters of Wales is rural, and the Welsh government said they "recognised victims and survivors in rural communities can face more barriers to accessing help".

"These challenges will be considered in our next national strategy to help ensure services are able to meet the needs of people across all parts of Wales," they added.

"No-one should ever be made to feel unsafe, scared, or at risk of abuse in their homes and communities."

If you or someone you know has been affected by the issues raised in this story, information about available help and support can be found viaBBC Action Line.