Radio Features

Here's Tom on my birthday 'treat'

"Ray is always telling me that he has more endurance, stamina and enthusiasm than a man 20 years his junior so I put him to the test for his birthday surprise and what a surprise it was.

Hold your breath and count to 10!

"Seven army-style assault course challenges to complete, competing against trained instructors from the Mersea Outdoors Activity Centre.

"I thought it was going well when Ray started off by climbing over a few large tyres, but then it became apparent that to complete the treat he would have to crawl on all fours through mud; stick his head under water that looked like sewage; and climb to heights previously unexplored.

"At various times I worried that at 54-years-old Ray just wouldn't cope and at one point, when I had to run and get him a chair, it looked like the end of him. But he did cope... and, like a father on a school sports day, I was very proud!

"It's my birthday in July and Ray if you're reading this I'd quite like to go and drive fast cars or on holiday somewhere hot for my present. I thank you!"

[Not a chance! - Ray]

Claire's first ever crumble - crumbles!

I'm no gooseberry fool

June is the most wonderful time of the year and the Planet Ray allotment is bursting with natural goodness. I've been living on a diet of strawberries and raspberries this week, and I'm rapidly turning into a big gooseberry man.

Ray Clark Breakfast Show newsgirl, Claire Sawyer, made her first ever crumble with gooseberries grown by my very hand. I think more food could follow; she's now comparing notes with other BBC Essex top chefs, Nick Alliker and Major Tom Warmington.

Stay behind after school

I couldn't wait to leave 'the big school' and I was no model student, but I went back to my old school for the first time in many years.

Look how smart I can look with a tie.

The Plume School in Maldon was celebrating 400 years of secondary education, and as I occasionally attended in the days of Maldon Grammar (I was really clever and passed my 11+, then took 8 'O' levels - and failed 7 of them), they asked me if I'd act as 'compere' for the evening.

It was a nice celebration, enjoyed by 400 former students and staff, including two girls who'd been friends since going to the school in the 1920's.

The story 'wot' you write

Another cracking story from Julia, Gloria, Ann and The Story Lady. You can join in too, e-mail your story starter.

And now... (insert drum roll here) This week's 'Where in Essex' clues

I've travelled at 100mph - Dunton (Done a ton)
The highest meadow - Toppesfield
Is this my valley? - Howe Green (there are 3 of them)
There are many of them - Severalls, Colchester
People here don't usually groan - Ongar (anagram of groan)