The theme of relationships in poetry
The poems for Unit 1 in the WJEC poetry anthology are grouped under different themes. This guide looks at the theme of relationships in poetry.
The term relationship is a word to show how people are connected and behave towards each other. Relationships come in many forms: with your family, friends, and teachers, for example. However, the two poems in Unit 1 focus on romantic connections.
This guide looks at two poems - one that is in the WJEC Anthology and one that isn't.
Valentine by Carol Ann Duffy is one of the WJEC anthology poems, which you will study in class.
Heart to Heart by Rita Dove is not in the anthology, so acts like the unseen poem in your Unit 1 exam. It is a good poem to compare with Valentine because it covers similar themes of relationships, love and clichéA phrase, idea, or action that has been used so much it feels boring, unoriginal, and empty of meaning.
Watch: Relationships
The similarities and differences between two poems on the theme of relationships
In this film we’ll focus on two poems on the theme of relationships – the way that people are connected and how they behave towards each other.
We’ll also look at how to discuss and compare poems effectively, by looking at their similarities and differences.
A good place to start with this is to find some of the techniques that poets use.
Symbolism is when a writer uses something like an object or an image, or even a colour, to suggest deeper ideas to readers. Personification is when a writer describes objects or things that are not human, as if they were a person. We can also look at the way poets use adjectives – these are the words that describe nouns – to help make their descriptions more memorable.
Valentine is a poem by Carol Ann Duffy which is about the rejection of the usual Valentine's Day clichés, and Heart to Heart by Rita Dove is a poem that looks at the limitations of love, and the longing for emotional connection.
If you’re trying to look for similarities between poems, it’s a good idea to look for ideas or quotes within the text that are similar.
In Valentine, Duffy writes “Not a red rose or a satin heart” and Dove begins Heart to Heart with “It’s neither red, nor sweet”.
Both poets use red to symbolize love and both go on to describe negative experiences of love. They reject traditional romance where we, the readers, might expect the colour red to represent a positive experience of love. But the nature of real love is not always sweet. Both Duffy and Dove present love honestly, as a layered and complex experience rather than a blissful fantasy.
Now, let’s look at the differences between the poems.
Look for quotes that really highlight these.
In Valentine, Duffy’s line “Its fierce kiss will stay on your lips” uses personification to show both power and passion. The onion is used by Duffy to show love as powerful and intense. It’s a metaphor for complicated, real love. The adjective “fierce” is used here to convey love as being strong and passionate.
Dove, on the other hand, uses rhythm and repetition to mirror a heartbeat that grows tired over time with the line, “I feel it inside its cage, sounding a dull tattoo: I want, I want”. This emphasises the intensity of the desire felt, making the longing noticeable to the reader.
These examples show how Duffy sees the heart as fierce and alive with passion, whereas Dove shows a love that slowly “dull[s]” over time and through repetition.
We’ve looked at some of the similarities and differences between these two poems. Have a look at both - what other similarities and differences can you see?
Give it a go.
Two poems on the theme of relationships
Valentine by Carol Ann Duffy
Carol Ann Duffy was the UK’s first female Poet LaureateAn honorary position appointed by the monarch of the United Kingdom on the advice of the prime minister. and the first openly LGBTQ+ poet to hold that position.
In Valentine Duffy challenges traditional notions of love by giving her lover an unusual token of love: an onion. Each stanzaLines of poetry that make up a section; a verse. focuses on a different aspect of the onion: its outer appearance; its ability to make people cry; its strong scent and taste; even its rings. Through this extended metaphorA metaphor is a word or phrase used to describe something as if it were something else. An extended metaphor takes this description and builds it over several lines or paragraphs so it becomes a theme of the piece of writing., Duffy compares the onion to her love - imperfect but passionate and faithful - as she offers it to her lover.
Heart to Heart by Rita Dove
Rita Dove is a black American poet who served as the United States of America’s Poet Laureate.
In Heart to Heart Dove rejects traditional representations of the heart, and therefore love. Like Duffy, Dove rejects the clichés used to express romantic love. But also like Duffy, Dove concludes her poem with a heartfelt plea for her lover to take her imperfect heart.
Key ideas to look for in the two poems
Valentine
| adjectiveAn adjective is a word that describes a noun. | Duffy rejects adjectives like “satin” and “cute” which present love as soft and sweet. Instead, she chooses to describe her love as “fierce” and “possessive”. Through her choice of adjectives, Duffy shows her honesty: love is not always gentle and selfless. |
| personificationA type of imagery in which non-human objects, animals or ideas are given human characteristics. | Duffy uses personification in the line: “Its fierce kiss will stay on your lips”, to imply how the strong aftertaste of an onion is like the passionate kiss of a lover. |
| repetitionWhere a word, phrase or idea is repeated for emphasis. | Duffy repeats words and phrases throughout the poem to reinforce important ideas and to create structure. For example, in the repeated line: “I give you an onion” she reminds her reader, that instead of the expected clichés, she offers a more unorthodox gift. The simplicity of the line mirrors the simplicity of the gift. |
| Extended metaphor | The onion becomes an extended metaphor, symbolising different aspects of love. It begins as a rejection of the materialismThe belief that having money and owning possessions is the most important thing. that has built up around Valentine’s Day. Duffy gives it to her lover as a simpler gift than expensive satin trinkets. As the poem progresses, however, the reader realises that the onion represents the layered experience of falling in love, both happy and sad. |
Heart to Heart
| Adjectives | Dove, like Duffy, rejects adjectives like red and sweet. Instead she chooses “thick” and “lopsided” to describe her heart. |
| verbOften called 'doing words', verbs are mainly used to describe an action. For example, if we say ‘the man sneezed’, the word ‘sneezed’ is the verb. No sentence can be completed without a verb. | In the first stanza, Dove uses a range of verbs “melt” “turn over”, “break” or “harden” which are customarily used to describe what the heart does, eg a heart is said to break when someone is deeply hurt. Dove uses these verbs only to reject them – she tells the reader that her heart does not do any of these things. |
| Repetition | The second stanza ends with Dove repeating the words "I want, I want- ” This replicates the rhythm of her beating heart and suggests her need for her lover is as fundamental as her heartbeat. |
| idiomatic language Phrases that have a meaning that is different from the literal meaning of the words. For example, feeling "under the weather" means feeling ill. | Dove rejects overused idiomatic language to do with the heart. For example, in the third stanza she tells us “there’s no key” to her heart, dismissing the clichéd, stale expression "He has the key to my heart" often used to suggest falling in love. Like Duffy, she is trying to be more truthful, so rejects over-used language. |
Sample exam question and answer
This is a sample answer to an example of a “How” question of the type that will be in the Unit 1 exam.
How is repetition of words and phrases used to affect tone and meaning in Valentine?
Duffy uses repetition in a variety of ways throughout Valentine. Firstly, she repeats negative language from the first line of the poem “Not a red rose or a satin heart” in a later line “Not a cute card or a kissogram.” This negative language “Not a” establishes a dismissive, defiant tone. Duffy lists the clichéd tokens of love like a red rose and a kissogramA novelty greeting delivered as a service by someone who reads a message and kisses the recipient. It became popular in the UK in the early 1980s. only to reject them. These gifts are so over-used that they have lost any meaning. Duffy is determined to find a new, honest way to express her personal, imperfect love.
Duffy also uses repetition of the verb “will” throughout the poem. She tells her lover/the reader what the onion/her love will do in phrases like: “It will blind you with tears” and “It’s fierce kiss will stay on your lips”. In both these lines “will” creates a sense of certainty. The words sound like a prediction or promise of what is to come if the lover chooses to accept Duffy’s offer of love.
Duffy also repeats the verb “cling” in the last lines of the poem. She does it to hint at the neediness that comes with vulnerableWhen something or someone can be easily attacked or hurt. when one loves. Being "clingy" in a relationship is seen as a negative, so Duffy is being very honest. The repetition of the verb "cling" could imply a warning that Duffy is passionate to the point of possessiveWhen someone wants to have all of another person's love and attention..
