Song: 'Trust me, I'm a Tudor doctor'
A comic song consolidating pupils' learning about the failings of Tudor medicine - including a number of extraordinary Tudor remedies.
Lyrics
Help me, please, dear Doctor,
I can’t get out of bed!
I’m sweating and I have a rash,
I hope it doesn’t spread!
Pop these leeches on your skin!
You’ll feel better before too long!
They’ll suck your blood and make you well,
Your rash will soon be gone!
You can trust a Tudor doctor,
I’m glad you came to me,
I’ll find a cure and make you well,
If you pay me handsomely!
Help me, please, dear Doctor,
I think I’m turning yellow!
My toe is red and swollen,
The pain it makes me bellow!
Mix worms and herbs and marrow,
Rub them on your toe!
Drink beer with lice, you’ll heal in a trice,
That yellow’s sure to go!
You can trust a Tudor doctor,
I’m glad you came to me,
I’ll find a cure and make you well,
If you pay me handsomely!
Help me, please, dear doctor,
I’m feeling rather sick!
My head is pounding like a drum,
You need to cure me quick!
Take these herbs to make you well,
If they don’t work, instead
Find yourself a length of rope
And press it to your head!
You can trust your Tudor doctor,
I’m glad you came to me,
I’ll find a cure and make you well,
If you pay me handsomely!
You can trust your Tudor doctor,
I never tell a lie,
These cures should work in the nick of time,
Now I must run - goodbye!
Song: 'Trust me, I'm a Tudor doctor' - Instrumental
