People

Please share your thoughts on CJ's story

L
I too went through abortion alone when i was just 19. I also knew immediately that it was the right thing to do and I certainly have no regrets! I can't imagine how much worse the whole experience would have been if i'd been living on the IOM and had to make the trip 'across'. You're even braver than me! It is a very tough choice but at the end of the day it was 'your' choice! Im now a qualified professional career woman and I certainly couldn't have achieved anything with a child in toe. The IOM should wake up to modern reality - mistakes really 'do' happen to even the most unlikley of women. Women should have the choice to abort if they can justify their decision.

Raymond
Dear C. I think you should be proud of yourself. What you did and what you have now achieved. All all the bigots will now expect you to use your doctorate to their advantages.Best of luck for the future Regards Ray

Adelle
This is such an important issue for women on the Island. By not changing the law the Isle of Man Government is restricting womens' rights. We want the right to CHOOSE our futures. This is not called the Isle of MAN for nothing. When I was 16 my best friend became pregnant after sleeping with her boyfriend for the first time. She had no help, no counselling and no adult guidance whatsoever. The abortion cost her £500 which was a lot of money back in the 80's but it was the emotional damage which lives with her still today. There was so much shame associated with her pregnancy which traumatised her completely. I travelled to Liverpool with her for the operation and we told our parents that we were going on a shopping trip. My friend spent the night in a hospital in a city she had never been to before with nurses and doctors who had no idea about her background and whether or not she had received any help. The whole thing was so upsetting. When she woke from the anaesthetic she was shouting "Did you get it all out" over and over again. I have never cried so much in my life. I couldn't believe my friend was going through such a horrible experience. When we both started our families recently she still felt an overwhelming guilt about the whole thing. It remains unresolved for her and probably will until her dying day. Thank you to the Isle of Man Government for this horrendous experience.

Carol
Responding to a previous comment, why isn't this being covered by Manx radio and the newspapers? It is such an obvious subject. I can only conclude that the Manx media is hand in glove with the government, otherwise this information would have come to light before now. I can't see any MHK going forward with this though because they're too scared of losing votes. However, this in itself just shows how backard our political system is. No one ever fights for really big issues like this. They get swept under the carpet.

Judy, IOM
I think Peter raises some very interesting points here. I too have heard that the IOM has very high teenage pregnancy rates. But as the article says, the IOM government doesn't know how high the teenage abortion rates are because it forces teenagers to travel to the UK t have abortions, thus ridding itself of having to face up to the reality that Manx teenagers are not getting sufficient sex education to stop tem from getting pregnant in the first place.

Peter
Is it true that the Isle of Man has the highest rate (per capita) of teenage pregnancy in the UK? Is it also true that the UK has the highest in Western Europe? Because that would make the IOM the highest in Western Europe. Quite an inditement, if it were true.Aside from the bankrupt morality of the legal status quo, there is a debate to be had about the long term cost of unwanted children versus providing what the article calls "social" abortions. It has been argued that there is an inverse correlation between the availability of abortion and subsequent crime.Why does the Isle of Man media let the Minister of Health get away with pretending there is no public demand for social abortions on the IOM? Why does an article like this not appear in the local media? Could it be that the local media is too tightly entwined with the power structures here to afford to rock the boat?If it's really up to Tynwald to legislate a way out of this disgraceful situation then why doesnt a Manx politician run on a pro-choice ticket? Could it be that the political culture here is rather too cosy and entrenched to allow for radical change? Some might conclude that having the longest running parliament in the world counts for nothing when this sort of social injustice is allowed to go unchallenged. It's one thing being poor and backward, but to be rich and backward is unforgiveable.One would think with so much charity money sloshing around somebody could start an IOM charity to provide support for dealing with unwanted pregnancies. If we can donate endless amounts for cancer and the starving masses then why not for pressing social troubles on our own doorstep? Are our own children any less deserving?

Lisa F.
Is any politician going to make a comment?

Laddie J.
This sounds more like something out of Up The Junction, set in the 1960's, than the Isle of Man. I had no idea I'd moved to such a backward thinking place. Why doesn't someone stat asking questions about this? For goodness sake, there is more talk about saving some bulldog on the island at the moment while youong women are feeling so trapped that they're trying to have miscarriages and sobbing in lonley guesthouses having had major operations. This is ludicrous. Do something!

Cathy
The worst thing here is that if you are working class, as the writer says, you are not going to get the same chances in this situation as someone with a big bank account.

Mary, Port Erin, Isle of Man
As usual, it is the most vulnerable in our society who are not protected. Does this really mean that if a woman is raped then she would first have to prove that this had happened before she would be allowed to have an abortion in the Isle of Man? Surely her word, in this kind of circumstance, should be enough?

Mi mi
It is a woman's right to choose what happens or doesn't happen in her own body.

Susan, Liverpool
I think that the isle of man government should start looking at these laws again. It is high time because it's obvious that people are suffering. With it being a small island maybe not that many people a year are effected but nevertheless even if one preson has to go through this experience it is one person too many.

N.P.
Very sad story. We seem to care more for sick animals on the Isle of Man than we do for human beings. Very sorry to hear this story.

Lucky Lady
I thought I was in this position when I was a teenager but fortunatly I wasn't pregnant after all. That was the worst month of my life, before finding out I wasn't pregnant. I had no money to get off the island, neither had he, I couldn't tell anyone because NOBODY talks about abortion here, I thought my life was going to be over before it had even started. Why should young women have to go through that? Why can't they have an abortion here? I don't think allowing access to abortion would encourage them to get prgnant. Nowadays, there's always the Morning After Pill anyway.

Andrew, Douglas
I am amazed that someone had to go through this. It is very sad to think of a teenager alone in some guesthouse in a big city going through this. If a womanis going to have an abortion then she'll have it, regardless of where. So we should allow her to have it done near her family and not punish her because she has happened to get pregnant.

CN
I know exactly how you felt hun coz i've been there. i was 24 when i had an abortion. i'd been raped & left pregnant 2 years before & had the baby adopted. When i found i was pregnant 2 years later i knew i wasn't ready. My gp was very supportive & gave me a list of clinics. I chose 1 in London & my best friend said she was coming with me, no arguments. I'm glad she did but i still felt lost & lonely from the minute we left to the minute we got back. my family supported me even though they may not have agreed with me.Like you i know it was the right decision for me, i too don't regret it. I'm not ashamed about it. No one has the right to judge us & tell us we were wrong because of their beliefs. It was our decision to make.I remember a few years ago a friend offered me a gold pin with a tiny pair of feet on. I asked her what it was & she said the size of a foetuses feet when aborted. I refused it gracefully & when she asked why i told her. She's never spoken to me since.A true friend does not judge you, but supports you even though they may not agree with you.Take care CJ & thank you for sharing 'our' story. Take care x

Jane
I found this story heart breaking. The reality of undergoing this mental stress alone and coping with any subsequent physical & emotional fall out after the abotion all alone in a a guest house is appalling. This is a medical procedure and every indivdual undergoing an off-island operation is, in my opinion, entitled to the same financial, medical and emotional support extended to those undergoing other operations. I can appreciate that it may be difficult to discreetly have an abortion on the Island but that is a point for open discussion.

Lesley, Doulgas
Are we living in the middle ages? Oh, no - we're living in the isle of man and it's the 21st century - except you wouldn't know it.

Brown Cow
I am crying as i write this because I went through the same experience as this girl when I was a teenager and I have never been able to tell anyone about it. even my mum never knew what had happened to me. the Isle of Man is too small and I couldn't face anyone labelling me, even though I dont' think I did anything wrong. I was very young at the time. It was the most awful experience of my life having to go away to Liverpool. I just hope that some politicians are reading this ebcause noone should have to go through what I went through.