Milton Jones

A Rough Guide

What is your show all about?

A Rough Guide seeks to explain absolutely everything in detail. Others would say it's a great big stream of jokes, a stream that becomes a tidal wave that will go over the head of millions of Americans.

Where and when can we see it?

Whitebelly, Underbelly, 7.20pm and about an hour before I'll be muttering it through up on Arthur's Seat.

Do you love Edinburgh or is it a chore?

I've always enjoyed Edinburgh's International Leaflet Festival.

What will you be doing with the other 23 hrs of the day?

Setting off fire alarms in other venues.

What's the best thing you've ever seen on the fringe?

A critic being persuaded to do five minutes stand-up and then being heckled to death by hundreds of comics.

What's the worst thing you've seen?

A comic with a sellout show who still owed his promoter eighteen thousand pounds.

What's the most curious thing that's happened to you in Edinburgh?

Meeting a man living rough who was letting out his flat in Morningside to some comedians.

If you could persuade one VIP to come to your show who would it be? Why?

Sadaam Hussein. In fact I believe the Americans caught him while he was checking out my venue.

If the Edinburgh fairy could grant your wish, what would your wish for?

To trace all quotes on posters back to thier origin and if they are untrue in any way the performer is banned form the Fringe.

What advice do you have for first time Edinburgh punters?

I'd say the rivers of Edinburgh are unsuitable for punting.